Hari Raya, a chaotic mish mash of house visits, food comas and discovering relatives you never knew about. This year would be a lot different for myself and the wife. Not only are COVID-19 restrictions easing up, we also have our little 1 year old joining us! For first time parents, it can be daunting enough to have a night out, let alone handling multiple open houses while lugging around your toddler(s). Today, I’ll do my best to break down some important things to keep in mind during this season of festivity.
If You Fail To Plan, You Plan To Fail
Gone were the days of spontaneous road trips and long first Raya house visits. Similar to how your daily lives were heavily affected by the emergence of your little lump of joy, so does your holidays. House hopping and visiting relatives whether near or far are absolutely draining even more so for your child. With long journeys and getting bored stuck inside a car, they’ll get bored quite easily and more than likely to throw tantrums your way.
How should you deal with this? Well, for sure you’ve got to prepare all the necessities before hand so that it’ll make the road trip bearable. With one person at the wheel, the other will solely be responsible for taking care of the little one. Preparing bottles, wipes, diapers and snacks before hand makes it easier to calm them down. I suggest to never go anywhere without your duffle bag of utilities. They are very much a life saver for quick in-car emergencies. Be sure to pack enough for at least 3 feeding times before hitting the road.
Toys are a MUST bring!
Mapping The Way To Your Raya House Visits
There is no better time to show off your coordinating skills then right now. While your partner is putting out fires with the toddler on the backseats, the driver has to be able to navigate their way to the houses by themselves. While you may be used to taking the scenic route previously, now, it’s all a matter of always being close enough to the nearest pit stop – be it convenience stores, a shop or toilets. You’ll have to be ready to take any necessary detour without sacrificing too much valuable driving time to your actual destinations.
Google maps or Waze makes great companion when you are on the road. Turn on the voice navigation so that you can be focused on driving! Remember that you are carrying an additional life in your car.
Beginning The Raya House Visits
For sure your parents will be delighted not only to see their kids back home but now with grandkids in tow! Your freedom to act here depends on if it’s a private visit or an open house. Never the less, always keep in mind of other guests upon arrival. Gauge the situation if there’re going to be other relatives or friends of your parents before parking into the garage. While it’s always great to see kids around during Raya, some guests (and even hosts) may not be so accommodating when dealing with minor annoyances. It’s unfortunate but that is the way we are.
Crowds can be a major shock for children, especially noisy ones. Ease yourselves into the house by slowly mingling with smaller groups of 3 or 5 first. Don’t divert too much of their attention to the child as it can freak them out. You wouldn’t want to spend your visiting time dealing with a crying toddler at the corner of the house do you? Depending on how your toddler reacts to crowd and the noise, you may want to take turns calming them down before rejoining,
Mind The Child!
Bringing a baby to a house visit does not warrant a free pass to do anything we want. Always be mindful of where your toddler is and what they’re doing. Make sure that they don’t go around breaking things or bumping into anything dangerous. No one will do it for you, so you have to be there to watch over.
The same goes when tantrums or crying starts. Do politely excuse yourself from the crowd to calm your toddler down. If luck has it, it’ll only be for a moment or if they are particularly sensitive to strangers then you may be gone for a while longer. If yours is the latter, then I’d suggest to get some practice by exposing them to new (COVID-free) people prior to any sort of house visits.
Keeping Things COVID-Free During Your Raya House Visits
You should maintain the cleanliness of your visits even when there’s no COVID! This means throwing out your trash properly, wiping any spills you made and keeping yourself sanitized regularly. Of course this includes being mindful of where your toddler’s hands have gone to. They are quiet care free in putting things into their mouth so be sure to keep an eye out at all times.
Bonus for COVID season, bring extra pairs of masks in case one gets dirty. Avoid letting people hold or touch your toddler willy-nilly so that you can minimize body contact between them and your child. Appreciation can still be done from a far😉.
It’s Like Multiplayer Mode
Before going, I’ve made sure that my wife and I are on the same page. This means understanding our roles and when to take turns taking care of our baby girl. Do not be selfish and only leave your child to your partner to take care while you enjoy your kuihs! The beauty of Raya house visits is that it’s a joyful time to be with family. We should share this moment with your partner and children too.
If you have ever played co-op games then you would know where I am getting at here. A successful mission means team work. The same goes for making house visits a successful one. Trust me, it’s a tougher mission than you’d notice but rewarding nonetheless! I’m sure that both you and your partner will come out of it better🙂.
Enjoy Yourselves!
Last but not least, try and enjoy yourselves whenever you can. Believe me, it can be frustrating and difficult at times but eventually you’ll get better at it. Like anything, you become good from practicing. your day 1 first house can be hectic but who’s to say it’ll be the same when it comes to your fourth or fifth house in a week’s time. Do not think it as a chore but more of a learning experience that only comes once for each child. When else will your kid be 1 years old anymore?
So be in the moment, be present and not to worry too much of what could go wrong. Things eventually do at some point, then it’s on you to adapt to the situation. I can tell you now that you will come out better parents out of this experience and can handle your kids anywhere!